The Pink Panther (9May06)

This week, Paul felt a little bit guilty. Not only did he make me see Syriana on Tuesday -- but we also ended up renting Jarhead on Saturday. And that's more guy movies than one girl can handle in a weeks' time. Really. It was rough.

So this week, I was allowed to choose any movie I wanted to see. Unfortunately, there wasn't a single movie playing at The Cheap Theater that I was just dying to see. I narrowed it down to The Pink Panther or Curious George -- then, at random, I went with the former.

Since it was an early movie, I made sure to get dinner ready on time. And Paul was home early, too, so it all worked out. In fact, as is often the case, it worked out too well. We were finished with dinner early -- and, before I stopped to think about what I was saying, I heard myself exclaim, "We could play a game!"

Will I ever learn?

So we cleared the table, set up one of our favorite games, and played for a while -- but I kept a close eye on the time. Five minutes before it was time to go, I ran off to get ready. I even changed my clothes -- because even I wouldn't go out in public in the sloppy tank top I had on. Besides, I'd freeze to death. Not thinking, I threw on a pink T-shirt -- which, I later realized, made me look pretty corny, considering the movie we were going to see. But I'm pretty sure it's not the first time I've looked especially corny -- and I'm also pretty sure it won't be the last.

Miraculously -- board game playing and all -- we made it out the door on time. We didn't get caught behind some crazy drunk guy on a cell phone, nor were we cut off by any crazy women who were trying to drink a cup of coffee, read a map, and drive at the same time -- and we actually found a parking spot that wasn't three miles away from the theater. It was all too perfect. Apparently, not only was Paul paying me back for watching a lot of guy movies, but karma was paying us back for all the obstacles we've had to face of late to get to Cheap Night. But, as I've learned, karma is fickle -- and I didn't want to push it. It was, however, a nice change. We barely had to wait in line to buy our tickets (which Paul, being the big spender he is, offered to spring for). My favorite ticket-ripper was on duty -- and he directed us to the theater right in front of us. One of the nice big ones. And the back row was totally empty. It was all just too good to be true.

This week at The Cheap Theater, however, it was Pepper Pot night. The theater was full of them. In fact, besides the trio of Beyonce fans who took the back corner and the two couples who walked in together at the last minute, I'd have to say that Paul and I were the youngest people in the theater by at least 30 years.

In general, Pepper Pots aren't the most enjoyable of theater companions. They usually make a lot of noise with their outraged gasps and their constant tittering -- not to mention their tendency to talk to one another in their outside voices. They're not especially considerate of those around them -- who would, under most circumstances, rather listen to the movie that they'd paid a whopping 50 cents for than listen to two old women discussing, for instance, Steve Martin's moustache. So you'd think I'd be seriously annoyed by a theater full of chatting, tittering, gasping, crowing, fluffy old broads. But, actually, I found them to be highly entertaining. They all found the movie to be way funnier than I did -- making a variety of delighted bird-like sounds during the parts that weren't even meant to be funny.

Granted, I probably would have been annoyed had I actually been watching a really good movie. But since The Pink Panther wasn't exactly the best movie I've seen this year, I found myself paying more and more attention to the Pepper Pots, giving them names (Mabel and Gertrude to the right of us...and Flossie ahead of us, who spent the movie yelling at her husband, Juke, and telling him which parts were funny) and making guesses at who would win if they all started beating one another with their purses. I gave Flossie the award for the Shrillest Voice, and Nettie up front got the award for Most Obnoxious Laugh. It was all great fun.

In fact, this week, I'd have to say that I may have enjoyed the live entertainment even more than I enjoyed the movie.